Photo challenge #3 | Messy

Prompt: Messy

Used

You're probably wondering, "what in the world is that?" Or maybe you aren't. But that's my bed quilt covers.

The prompt reminded me of it my mum always says I need to "straighten it out". To her, this is messy.

To me, it used to be messy as well. Not really as much anymore. I've learned to embrace the mess. Not everything needs to be perfect.

Mess is often seen in a negative light. While I acknowledge that mess can hold a negative connotation, I think we often undermine the beauty of the mess. Many a time, we find ourselves in a messy situation which could be interpreted as a bad thing. But if we were to pause for a second and think about why this was a mess in the first place, we would be able to even see the beauty of it.

This could be a follow-up from my previous post. In the journey of life, it's not always a smooth sailing time. We will sometimes encounter messes. Messes are needed to help us think through our decisions. They can be useful in redirecting us. Or it can be a time when we need to be grateful with how much stuff we are able to posses. We're making use of something. We're learning. We're exploring. All these are good things. Often it's really hard to achieve these things without encountering mess.

You could be in a really bad place now. That's another kind of mess. But no matter what your mess is, how it got to that state or what the mess is about, you don't have to clean up everything right now. Take your time to figure out how to organise the mess. Sometimes it takes just a second to straighten the sheets out, sometimes it takes a bit (or a lot!) longer. Find people who will help you walk through and sort through the mess, without judgement.

For me personally, I am really appreciative of those who share their life mess with me. These are the people whom I know I can be real with, who I can journey with. If your life is spick and span, I'm sorry to say that you haven't lived. Get a little messy, have a little fun. Join someone in their mess. Invite someone to join you in your mess.

How are you dealing with your mess?

p.s. Please seek professional help if you are unable to handle your life mess. It is not shameful to speak to a counsellor, psychologist/psychiatrist.

Photo challenge #2 | Look Up

I must admit that I hoped I could get a very different picture than the one I currently have. I only managed to take one today. I thought of giving up and passing for the day, but I decided against that. I want to commit to it and not do it halfheartedly. So here it is. Today's picture.

Prompt: Look Up

Climbing

Something that pushed me to continue with this photo was the fact that climbing up a stairs is like life. In life, there are destinations that we need to get to. Some journeys are worth it, some are not. Just like when someone calls you from the top of the stairs just to tell you that they'd forgotten what they called you up for. But some are totally worth it. Like perhaps a cheesecake. It doesn't matter how big or small the destination is. Lots of obstacles might get in your way, or there might even be phases of the journey before the final destination. But at the end, with perseverance and persistence, you'll reach your destination. Some times, it may look daunting, but at the end of it, you'll be proud of yourself to know how far you've come. Having good support networks is essential. They are the people who will encourage you and guide you along the way, some who make the journey a worthwhile one, and even some who journey alongside you.

Sometimes it's necessary to abandon the journey. Do so carefully, so that you don't tumble down the stairs. Use it instead as a step in another direction and build upon what you gained from it.
Sometimes it's necessary for a pause to reroute or rejuvenate and that's okay too.

Keep climbing. I'm rooting for you.

How are you doing with the stairs of life?

Photo Challenge #1 | Empty

I'm trying something new. I like photography of still objects, nature, landscapes, food, and occasionally people. I really do want to improve my manual photography skills. This is sort of like a project for me. I found this challenge on this website. Basically, a prompt is given for each day of the year, and we are supposed to use our creativity to interpret what the prompt is and find something that corresponds to it. Since I'm not moving around much/doing lots of different things, I am quite limited in what I can take. So I know I won't be able to have a photo everyday of the year (although I'd very much love to have a photo everyday), but I thought it would be a fun challenge and project to do for the rest of the year.

But here's what I managed to capture for today's prompt.

Prompt: EMPTY

 

 

This was my favourite of the two that I took today.

Delicious

 

But here's the other one. I liked the effect of being able to take a subject up close and have the background blurred off a bit (is there a technical name for it??), but after I took it I realised that this restaurant's glass was really dirty and it didn't really give the photo a nice look. But I still kept it anyway. 

Anyway, if you know a thing or two about manual photography and all the different settings of the camera, I would love to hear your feedback and learn a thing or two about how I can improve my photography. As I'm really an amateur at this, I don't really know how to ask for any specific feedback, so any feedback is good! But please be kind :) 

Being the philosophical me, I have to leave this question. After all, there's a reason why I've named my blog as such! ;) These are empty, but my stomach was full. When something's empty, something else is full. 

What's empty and what's full in your life?

Bek's Reads | Book Review #1 | THE AMATEURS by Sara Shepard

I'm an avid fan of mysteries. I grew up reading Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Famous Five, Five Find Outers and a few less common titles. I hadn't picked up a mystery novel in a long time. However, this one caught my eye when I visited a bookshop recently. I picked it up and read the synopsis. It sounded intriguing which made me want to open it up and read it. Unfortunately, it was wrapped. So I took the chance and bought it.

Once I pick up a book, it's hard for me to put it down. But amidst the weekend shenanigans, I managed to finish it over a weekend. I'm sure if I read it straight through without stopping, I would have finished it in less than a day. Well, for one, I am quite a fast reader. But also, it was only three-hundred plus pages long. Not too long for a story book.

I didn't have too many expectations for this book as this was the first young adult mystery book I've ever read (yeah, I know... like WHAT!? I stopped reading fiction books for awhile, okay?). I'm very pleased to say that I have been pleasantly surprised by the level of my enjoyment of the story. I'll try not to spoil anything, in case you would like to read it yourself.

The story adopts a multiple point-of-view concept, where each chapter is from the perspective of a different character in the story. The chapters are rotated among the main characters of the story. Although it's not mentioned who is speaking in the chapter, the reader will quickly find out whose perspective they are reading from within the first few sentences. I had my doubts at first, because switching between so many characters can become very confusing for the reader if not written well. However, the author's adept writing skills showed through the readability throughout the novel and my doubts quickly dissipated.

The story is told in quite a realistic manner. I very much enjoyed the pace of the story. Where you would expect the events to roll by quickly, it did. And when it was supposed to be slow - meaning more detail expected - it was very much so. The story carries the reader along with it, and you get to play detective as well, trying to figure out whodunit. I appreciate that it was well thought out, unlike some other stories where the beginning starts out way too slow, and then everything seems to happen way too quickly after that, as if the author was running out of word quota or pages to write on. Information of the case is given out as if it were playing out in real time and it makes the reader feel very much as if they were part of that story as well. Feelings of characters seemed realistic as well, and I could personally feel connected to each of them as they were allowed to tell a bit of their stories during their respective chapters. In my opinion, this story was so realistically written that it could probably pass as a real-live event. Characters don't go through "happily ever afters" that we see in the movies. Events happen as in real life - some end happy, some end otherwise. Emotions are expertly expressed through the writing. I found myself often time throughout the time I was reading it wanting to comfort the distraught characters, celebrate with their wins and mourn their losses.

In a world full of unpredictability, it's always nice to have some predictability, especially in a fictional story. But I was pleasantly surprised that I did not get that at the end. I loved the fact that I did not really see the end coming (or is it my dwindling detective skills??), instead it left with a cliffhanger, leaving the reader longing for more. Thank God this is a series and there are two more books to this series, as I later found out. I would very much like to get the second and the third book to see how each character develops across time. Oh yes, that's another plus. The character development is excellently expressed. Each character has their own unique personality which develops in different directions across time. No one ends up in the same place. Everyone is still trying to find themselves, just like in real life - I love it.

Despite some explicit language and sensual descriptions of romantic encounters (as most young adult novels have anyway), I very much enjoyed myself reading this novel throughout. Great job to the author who has me hungry for more of the story and wanting to get to know the characters a lot better.

I give the book a rating of DEFINITELY RECOMMEND for those mystery novel enthusiasts out there. The book is available on Book Depository's website (accessed May 2019) and they deliver worldwide.

Prayer When I'm Hurt

Lord I have many wounds,
please heal them.
For by your wounds, I am healed.

Lord I have many scars,
please heal them.
Through your scars I have confidence in your promises.

Lord I feel betrayed,
please show my your love.
You know what it feels like to be betrayed, yet you still love me.

Lord I feel unloved,
please pour out your love on me.
Help me to trust in your love for me as I remember daily the act of salvation because you loved us.

Lord I feel overwhelmed by the cares of this world,
please help me cast my cares on you and let me trade my burden with yours.
For you have said that your yoke is light.

Lord I feel distracted,
please keep me focused on you.
Jesus at the centre of it all!

Lord guide my steps.
Help me to trust in your perfect will.

The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble.

He cares for those who trust in him.

Nahum 1:7

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.

Lamentations 3:22-23

I lift up my eyes to the mountains - where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the maker of heaven and earth.

Psalm 121:1-2

Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken.

Psalm 55:22

I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust."

Psalm 91:2

Are Your Hands Opened or Closed?

A reflection from 4 August 2018

I COME WITH TIGHTLY CLOSED HANDS
Reflection night tonight. So much I poured out to God. And then the picture came. Of me coming to the Father saying "Take these hurts and failures from me. Take my heart and heal it." But my hands were closed. The closed hand - symbol of power, the desire to have revenge, the desire to hold on tight, to control.

Here I was standing before God, asking Him to take these things from me but with closed hands. Because it's easier to have your hands closed. It means protection. No one can put anything horrible into your hands. The safety and security. No one can take what is yours. Right? Well, maybe. But it also meant God could not trade my sorrows with his joy. It meant that I could not receive his blessings.

Such a simple illustration with such profound importance. In the attempt to protect myself, I have closed off the blessings that God wants to bestow upon me because I am his child. The hurts I want God to heal, but I still hold on tightly to them.

I COME WITH OPEN HANDS
I want to really surrender what I have in my hands to God and allow him to take the bad stuff and trade it with the good stuff.
I want my hands open so I can grab on to him.
I want my hands wide open so that whatever God has given me I can share with others.
Can we ever receive anything if our hands are full and tightly closed?

I want my hands wide open

GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD

After a weekend of feeling down, having low mood throughout the day, yesterday (Monday) looked a little better. However, my mood was still pretty low. This morning, I woke up still with pretty low mood. My heart silently prayed that I would have enough emotional capacity to handle today. Every Tuesday, I work at a clinic for a few hours. This means I see patients who may have come from anywhere in life and may bring anything to the consultation. I prayed the same prayer I pray every morning: “Lord give me strength to go through this day”.

On my way to the clinic, I had this sudden burst of energy. I could feel an instantaneous change in my mood. (See people, sometimes it’s not just psychological. The biochemicals in the brain don’t always work the way you want it to). It was such a sudden, drastic change that it actually took me by surprise. Where did I suddenly get this burst of emotional energy from? I was able to get through work with sufficient emotional capacity to do my work well.

On my way back from the clinic, I was thinking about it. And then the phrase, GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD came into mind. God gave me just enough. Just like his provision for the Israelites in the wilderness.

Today was a surprisingly good day. And I thank God for it!

I even got to share a little bit of what I believe in with my colleagues! Even though I was cut short by my next patient arriving before I could get to the important point that I wanted to talk about, I believe God will use whatever little I have said. I’m confident that I will have a lot more opportunities to talk about what I believe in in the days to come. Most importantly, I hope that all that I say and do will be a living testimony unto Christ. If I’m the only Bible they’re going to read, then may I be it well with the help of the Spirit guiding me.